Beseeched by The Writing Bug

Surviving a recent breakup, I was randomly hit with the inspiration to start writing again. It has been the one constant thing in my life that’s kept me grounded and the one practice I turn to when I need to process my emotions and thoughts. My intention is to practice mindfulness, play, and fill my cup with the things that make my heart sing. 

For the longest time, I subscribed to the belief that my purpose in life is to learn. That the Earth is one giant classroom, and I’m a life-long student. Every circumstance and every person that I cross paths with is here to teach me a lesson, and if I still my mind, tame that wild ego, and remain open to receiving, that life will be sweet as f*ck. Today, I make the conscious choice of choosing the sweet path.

Today’s lesson came to me at the gym while working out with my sister. One of the things that I decided I’d take on to help me get over my breakup is to attempt exercising consistently again. So, as I was in the middle of doing a deadlift rep, I started to feel bored and uninspired. I didn’t have my usual music, which is a significant motivator for me and I quickly became withdrawn. I heard a familiar voice faintly urging me to give up, grab a Frappuccino from Starbucks, and go home instead. Aware of my thoughts, I decided that I wouldn’t be bullied by them. Instead, I acknowledged the menacing voice in my head and continued with the exercise. 

“Just don’t think about it, do it,” I told myself. Then, I got curious and chose positive-based thoughts. “I will use this music-free, brutally annoying situation as a way to exercise mindfulness and be present during my workout,” I thought. I reminded myself that I had never regretted working out, only when I didn’t. Giving my voice the space to vent along with the encouraging pep-talk I gave myself helped get me out of the mental stupor. Finishing the workout, I proudly limped out from the gym, feeling thankful for the tools I’ve acquired along my journey.

So the lesson here is to be conscious of our thoughts, hear them out, and shift our thinking. It helps to start small, without any self-criticism or judgment for having “bad” thoughts to begin with. Then, allow yourself to succeed in a way that makes you proud of yourself! The mind is risk-averse. It will play tricks on us and wants us to be in a place of complacency. Because, how dare we be the best versions of ourselves?!